This is my first blog, and that loathable Adam Lambert is responsible. I saw the cover to his new album and thought, "something needs to be done. someone needs to tell the people what's insane about this marketing." Look, we understand. Adam Lambert is gay. When he came out, I was about as shocked as when I found out that Billy Mays did coke. Just not one of those ground-breaking admissions. But this is just embarrassing for everyone involved.
Let's look first at the font used to write out "Adam Lambert". Outer Glow? Of a purple-blue gradient? And for the love of God, WHY SO MANY LENS FLARES??
Then's there's the background, which honestly looks like it belongs on a Rush album. Adam Lambert, are you trying to put yourself on a level with Neil Peart? Keep dreaming.
Moving on, there's this little fingerless glove number he's sporting. A possible throwback to the days of madonna? honestly, picture this glove in lace. Madonna, right? Which naturally leads me to the painted nails, which I guess is the only thing I can just let by without truly commenting on. It's been done enough that it's really not shocking anymore.
Hair. Blue because of strange lighting or dyed that way? Can't decide. But it's so...blue. And shiny. And feathery.
Those eyebrows! Goodness! someone got a little tweezer happy, and it is certainly not helping the argument that somewhere in this man, there lives a hint of testosterone.
Then, there's the make-up. Mascara. Eyeshadow. And...lipgloss???
Strange gradient that cuts him off at the shoulders? Yeah, I don't get it either.
Finally, there is the name of the album itself: "For Your Entertainment". It sounds like the name of a sleazy strip club by the airport. Then there's the strange, 80s-esque font used to actually write out the title. Just truly awful.
In closing, Adam Lambert just made my "Never Going to be Taken Seriously" list. It wasn't a far jump for him to make, but he did it.
